Ice Cream is Taking Over the World!!!

Many people complain about how the candy companies have taken over the holidays like Halloween and Easter. I'm here to let you know about an even more subtle and insidious conspiracy. The ice cream companies have taken over an entire season, Springtime, especially the end of Springtime. They do not advertise their take over and so have avoided detection while spreading their plot to world domination. (They may or may not have teamed up with magazines like Shape, who have also taken over a season: Summer, a.k.a Bikini Season.) To illustrate my point and to expose their evil conspiracy I give you these examples:

Situation: It's the end of the semester and you are stressed about finals, the horrible tests that can determine your grade.
Solution: Ice Cream

Situation: You said up way to late studying for finals and you need a pick up to get you going.
Solution: Ice Cream

Situation: You wound up failing your finals despite all your studying.
Solution: Ice Cream

Situation: You completely rocked your finals and want to celebrate.
Solution: Ice Cream

Situation: It's the end of the semester, and you have to go through all the hassle of moving.
Solution: Ice Cream

Situation: All your friends are graduating, and you are going to miss them as they move away.
Solution: Ice Cream

Situation: You are graduating and you are so excited to be done with school. But you are also terrified of having to actually go out, find a job,  enter the real world, and in general figure out the rest of your life.
Solution: Ice Cream x 2

Situation: It's the end of the semester and you're boyfriend broke up with you because he is graduating / leaving to summer job / wants to be free during the summer.
Solution: Ice Cream

Situation: It's the end of the summer, you are sick of hearing about your roommates wedding plans, and you realize that everyone is getting married in the next couple of weeks but you.
Solution: Ice Cream

Situation: You are getting married soon and you need to celebrate.
Solution: Ice Cream

Situation: Your child is graduating from high school and will soon be moving out, and you are filled with sorrow at the thought of your baby growing up and leaving the nest.
Solution: Ice Cream

Situation: You are graduating high school, leaving home and completely excited to grow up.
Solution: Ice Cream

Situation: Sumer is approaching, you actually live somewhere with sunshine and it's starting to get really hot.
Solution: Ice Cream

Situation: You live in Logan, it's the last week of April and it's snowing.
Solution: Ice Cream, and plane ticket.

Yes, I might be going through an ice cream craving right now (and stress), but that has no bearing on any of my points whatsoever.